When Doubt Shows Up, What Do We Do With It, Together?

I just came back from ten days away with no computer (and I limited my phone use). Re-entry is always an adjustment, and I know it's been a good reset when everything I do requires me to stop and think before doing. That could be why my weekly mindset reset (Sunday service) mattered even more this week, because Rev. Jim Boone's talk was exactly what I needed to hear on my return (caught the YouTube replay).

Continuing with our May theme, Divine Doubt, Rev. Jim, one of our awesome practitioners, a Centers for Spiritual Living minister who runs a focus ministry inside senior living communities, and a truly inspiring human, focused on Carrying Our Doubt Together. His assessment: Doubt is a compass, not a verdict.

Doubt is a snapshot of where you are relative to what matters to you. It's not the whole journey, nor is it the end of the story. It's simply: Where am I, and where do I want to go?

Rev. Jim connected this to something Rev. Gary Ninneman introduced when he opened this month's theme - the Alan Watts idea that the menu is not the meal. We can get so deep in the planning, the overthinking, the what-ifs, that we stop experiencing the actual thing we're preparing for. Doubt, when it takes over, does the same thing.

Doubt as a compass: two ways it shows up

Rev. Jim broke this into two categories.

• Discerning doubt can give you focus. It asks what needs to change, what the obstacles are, and whether you're headed in the right direction. You can work with it.

• Disabling doubt feeds on itself. It loops, it blames, it spirals into worst-case thinking and stops feeling like a question and starts feeling like a conclusion.

Rev. Jim said you can usually feel the difference: One makes you feel like you have something to do, the other makes you feel like nothing you do will matter.

His test: Does this doubt make you feel more capable, or less? Is it pointing toward growth, or toward disaster?

It's not just your thoughts. And yes, that matters.

One of the things we teach in Centers for Spiritual Living is that our thoughts are creative. The universal creative mind receives the direct impression of our thoughts and acts on it. Rev. Jim acknowledged how that can sound alarming when doubt is running the show, which is where he dropped a Scooby-Doo "ruh-roh" on us. Fair.

But he was quick to get to what Ernest Holmes actually said: This doesn't mean one worried thought creates a catastrophe (phew!).

Instead, it's more of our overall mindset - those collective thoughts, coupled with feelings and behaviors, that drive our lives.

Growth is gradual. Holmes wrote that the way to proceed is to begin right where we are, and that who we are is a product of who we've been, but that doesn't mean we have to stay there.

All it takes is one

Rev. Jim said something near the end of his talk that I'm writing down and posting on my office wall: All it takes is one.

We have some collective doubt right now. We're in a search for a senior minister, and that brings real questions. Who will we attract? Who will want to join us? That's natural.

Doubt is a guide, a compass, and in this case, it can help us gain clarity.

Rev. Jim talked about what he tells his wife when she's deep in doubt about a real estate deal: All it takes is one. You don't need every option to work out. You don't need the market to be perfect or the timing to be ideal. You need one right family to find one right house. And more than one exists. Life brings the one.

The same applies to us right now. He said there isn't one single perfect candidate we have to desperately hope for. There are more possibilities than one. We need just one. And one is coming.

Marcus Aurelius wrote notes to himself

Rev. Jim closed with a quote from the Meditations, which Marcus Aurelius wrote not for posterity but for himself. Private notes to stay on track, return to principle, and keep his own thinking straight. The most powerful person in the ancient world was writing himself encouragements in a journal. I find that both humbling and completely relatable.

Journaling is a great therapeutic tool for clarity, creativity, or processing.

The quote was from Book 5, and the idea is this: Obstacles don't have to stop us. The mind can take what's in the way and turn it into the very thing that moves us forward. The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.

He asked us to leave with two questions. I'm leaving them here without commentary because they're better that way.

• What meaning does your doubt point to?

• What can we do together with that meaning to help each other grow?

For me, it means acknowledging the doubt, and then leaning into universal principles and truths. I'll admit it isn't always easy, and, I appreciate the questions and the process.

Gratitude

Before signing off, I want to give a giant shout out to the cleaning team on Saturday, and my regret that I couldn't be there. Led by Bonnie Pasek, the team knocked it out of the park and I can't wait to see how it all looks. We have amazing people, and I remain grateful for everything you all do to continually create a welcoming, inclusive, divinely inspired space.

With gratitude,

Laura